


The AmazingGlee Race 2: A Whole New World

by dreamcatcher (darcangell23), grlnxtdr29



Series: The AmazinGlee Race [2]
Category: Glee
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Meddling Fools, New Partners, Race Again, around the world, new challenges
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-15
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-19 08:18:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 17,594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20654069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darcangell23/pseuds/dreamcatcher, https://archiveofourown.org/users/grlnxtdr29/pseuds/grlnxtdr29
Summary: Twelve teams have come for another chance at a million dollars in a race around the world. Returning faces with new partners and some with the same. But we've got new faces too. Can Kurt and Blaine win the race together now that they have each other's hearts? Or will a certain team try to come between them? With everything to deal with on the race, will they realize the schemes going on under their noses?





	1. Prologue: Here We Go Again

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys!
> 
> Welcome to the second installment of The AmazinGlee Race! This time, my co-author and I have some plots going on behind the scenes while the race is on. See if you can figure out what certain people are up to! We have been a little bit slower paced on this one but progress is being made. If you'd like to read ahead, my co-author once again has all finished chapters posted on her ff.net!
> 
> As always, comments and kudos make us smile!

Kurt was a nervous wreck, despite the fact that the wedding had gone off without a hitch, and the reception was in full swing. Blaine had just dropped a bombshell in his lap, and he didn’t know what to do about it.   


When Phil had called last week and asked if he wanted to go on The Amazing Race again, he had asked for time to think it over, but had been pretty sure he was going to say no. He’d just gotten a promotion at Vogue, from intern to style commentator, which meant he’d be giving his opinions on current trends, and if the editors liked them, they’d be used in the magazine. He’d also be working more closely with Isabelle, who had been the one to recommend him for the position.

He and Blaine had been keeping in touch nightly, talking for hours on the phone and on Skype, but Kurt had been kept so busy, between the promotion and planning not only Burt and Carole’s wedding, but Tina and Mike’s as well, that he hadn’t had a chance to visit his boyfriend in Michigan.   


And Blaine had been busy as well. Mercedes had recorded his song, and released it as the first single on her debut album. It hit number two on Billboard’s R&B charts, and ever since, he’d had several commissions from various artists, and had been asked to write the score for a major motion picture.

The curly haired man had flown into Lima the day before, for Burt and Carole’s wedding. Kurt had been there a couple of days already, overseeing last minute details. It was the first time in over a month that they had been face to face, not since Blaine had to come to New York to film some of the confessionals for the race. He’d only been in town one night, and had stayed with Kurt, but they'd both been so exhausted, all they had done was sleep, and Blaine had to fly back to Michigan the next day.

The first episode of their adventure around the world had aired that night before the wedding, and most of the friends they had made on the race who were in town for the wedding had packed into the Hummel house to watch it together.   


Kurt had been a bit bummed that he hadn’t had more than a few minutes alone with Blaine since the shorter man had arrived. Mercedes and Tina had latched on to the hazel eyed man. The dark skinned goddess wanted to discuss a couple of songs he was working on for her, and the goth Asian wanted his opinion on serenading Mike at the wedding. Theirs would take place on New Years Eve, in roughly six weeks.

Today he’d been ready to call Phil back and politely turn down the offer, with the excuse that his dad had hinted at a desire to partner with Carole if he could. Kurt wasn’t thrilled with the idea of his dad going on the race again, either, but decided that with Carole there to keep an eye on and take care of him, his dad deserved the chance to have that adventure with his wife.

Now Blaine had informed him that he had been invited to come back for the race as well, but Cooper wouldn’t be available to partner with him, as he’d landed a role in a movie, and would be filming on location in Anchorage, Alaska when the race would begin in January.   


He could partner with Blaine, they could spend a month together, day and night. And maybe Kurt could find the chance to ask that very important question he’d been thinking about for the past few months…

“Please say you’ll go on the race with me?” Blaine all but begged, giving him that puppy dog face he had yet to build any immunity to.

Kurt rolled his eyes. “Fine! But only because I love it when you beg!”

Blaine smirked at him. “Wanna make me beg for something else?”

Kurt raked his eyes over the other man, noting how well the tailored tux fit the shorter man, and how well the brooch Kurt had picked up in India, and had given to Blaine for their twenty week anniversary a few weeks ago, and was now affixed to the lapel, brought out the honeyed highlights in those hazel eyes. His gaze moved lower to the very obvious bulge in the other man’s crotch.

The pale man tried to give Blaine an expression of disapproval, indicating he thought he was out of place for being so turned on at his dad’s wedding. But at the same time, it had been so long since he and Blaine had a private moment together. He was still a little miffed at not getting time alone with him the night before.

Instead of trying to scold him, Kurt gave in, grabbing the man’s hand and leaving the reception hall, not caring if anyone noticed them heading away from the party.

Truth be told, someone had. Burt Hummel was eyeing his son from his seat at the head table with his new wife. The man had a knowing look on his face and a glance at Carole told him that she hadn’t missed her stepson’s nonchalant way of exiting the reception with his boyfriend either.

“You know,” Carole said to him with a slight smirk, setting her glass of champagne down. “He doesn’t have a bad idea.”

Burt’s eyes widened at her words. “Are you seriously suggesting we sneak off at our own wedding?” he asked.

“Who said consummating the marriage had to wait until the honeymoon?” she responded with a sly wink. Burt watched her stand from the table and start heading for the exit, perhaps on a pretense of using the restroom, but he knew that wasn’t what she had in mind.

The man waited a few moments before he stood and followed his new wife out of the reception hall.

Meanwhile, Kurt was shutting the door to one of the dressing rooms, standing against it and switching the lock. He was now eyeing his boyfriend with a hungry look in his eyes. Maybe sneaking off at his dad’s wedding wasn’t the best time for them to reconnect this way, but Kurt no longer cared. All he wanted was the feeling of being in Blaine’s arms again. That private moment they got so few of now that they weren’t on the race anymore. He found it funny that they’d had more moments alone during the race than they did now.

“Have I ever told you how much you turn me on?” Kurt asked, stepping forward and pressing his hand lightly to Blaine’s chest, walking him back until he fell on the chaise in the room. The pale man looked around. “They need a bed in here,” he deadpanned.

“This is a dressing room, Kurt,” Blaine stated with a snort of laughter.

Kurt shrugged. “So? You don’t think sometimes the bride and groom need to stay overnight so they can leave in the morning?”

Blaine just looked at him for a moment. “Less talking, more kissing,” he finally said, reaching out to grab Kurt by his tie.

Kurt shook his head and pulled back. “I thought you were going to beg?” He smirked at Blaine, effectively hiding his urge to just pounce on him. Thank a God he didn’t believe in, that he was such a good actor.

Blaine whined and cupped his hands together in a pleading manner. “Please! Please make love to me Kurt!” he cried.

The very sight gave the pale man an idea. He undid the tie from around his neck and slipped it around his boyfriend’s wrists, tying it into a knot, tight, but not so much that it was hurting the other man. Blaine watched his actions with a growl.

“Behave. I could have tied them behind you,” he said with a wink. Kurt toed his shoes off and crawled slowly over the top of the other man, snapping his teeth in a hungry growl. “I would love to taste you from the top of your head, all the way down to the tip of your toes.”

“Please,” Blaine peeped.

Kurt lightly dragged his fingers down Blaine’s chest, tugging his dress shirt free of his pants.

“Touch me Kurt! Please put your hands on my skin!” Kurt clicked his tongue in a tsking manner.

“So needy, and yet, not quite enough.” He grinned a devilish grin and slowly began to pop the buttons on Blaine’s shirt, one at a time, using only one hand as he brought the other up to push Blaine’s bound wrists above his head.

Blaine lifted his head, trying to bring their lips together in a kiss. But Kurt released his shirt and pushed the other’s head back down gently.

“Not so fast, hot stuff,” he said. He wanted to attack Blaine’s lips just as much, but Blaine had said he wanted to beg, so he was going to make him beg.

Slowly, the pale man stood up. “Don’t move,” he said. “I’ll be right back.”

Blaine pouted. “Where are you going?” he asked.

Giving in for just a moment, to reassure Blaine that everything was fine, Kurt leaned over and pecked a soft kiss to his lips. “I need to get a few useful things. I promise I’ll be right back, okay sweetie?” he stated.

The curly haired man nodded his head and Kurt blew him a kiss before slipping back out of the room, strolling down the corridor as fast as he could while still being casual.

Blaine decided he needed to hurry this along in some way, mostly because he wasn’t sure how long they could stay here, but also intending to entice Kurt.

With some difficulty because his hands were still bound at the wrists, he managed to strip the rest of his clothes off, his erection springing free.

Kurt was back at the door to the room in no time, with the things he’d gone out to get. He had stored some useful things in his car because he was very quick to learn that with Blaine, he always needed to be prepared. They were always feisty and he was realizing, he didn’t mind it as much as he had with his ex-boyfriends.

However, he didn’t want Blaine to think he was rushing for him. So he forced himself to wait outside the door for a number of minutes, until he heard Blaine let out a loud whine from inside the room, clearly impatient waiting for him to return. Kurt smiled to himself.

He opened the door and stepped inside, clearly ready to take back control but pausing in his tracks when he found his boyfriend fully naked on the chaise. Though Blaine had replaced his bound wrists above his head, which gave Kurt a sudden image of exactly how talented the man he loved was. It appeared that even though he was now naked, the other man had behaved himself and not moved like Kurt had told him.

“How did you…” he started, wondering exactly how Blaine had pulled it off.

The curly haired man gave the other a seductive look. “You should close your mouth love,” he said. “The only thing I want slipping in there is my cock.”

Kurt tightened his grip on the items in his hands. Blaine was making it increasingly more difficult for him to regain control. He shut his eyes for a beat, drawing a deep breath before he crossed the room and once more, straddled his boyfriend.

“I thought I told you to behave,” Kurt said. He tsked yet again. “Now I’m going to have to add to your punishment.” He grabbed one of the items he’d brought, which he’d set on the floor beside them. “Raise your head for me please.” Blaine did as he was told, looking at Kurt with lust blown pleading eyes. The taller man slipped a strap over his boyfriend’s head and fixed the ball at the front in the man’s mouth. He grinned to himself. “Now, you need to be a good boy, but I still want to see you beg.”

Blaine wondered for a moment how he was supposed to beg, now that the ball gag was in his mouth and when the hell had Kurt gotten one of these things? He’d had no idea the other man was interested in things becoming this kinky. But you learned something new about those you loved everyday, right?

Kurt began his attack, by slowly kissing down the other’s chest, taking a moment to pay attention to each of the other man’s nipples, causing Blaine to whine with want and need. It took everything the younger man had to not arch off the chaise, and push himself into the other’s mouth.

The pale man’s kisses stopped at the waist, just before Blaine’s hips dipped into that V. Kurt sat back up, straddling his boyfriend’s legs and raised his hands to the top button of his own dress shirt, intending to give the other a show.

“Do you want me to remove it Blaine?” he asked in a low voice. Blaine growled through the gag, following it with a whine. “Nod or shake your head please,” Kurt added, using a politely authoritative sounding voice. It was at that moment, the other wondered if Kurt might have had a stint in BDSM or something. Maybe he would ask him later. Either way, everything his boyfriend did was turning him on even more. “Blaine?” Kurt questioned.

It wasn’t until then that the curly haired man realized that he had yet to fully respond to the other and he nodded his head quickly.

Kurt licked his lips and slowly undid his shirt, one button at a time, until it was able to just slide right off him.

Blaine whined, lowering his bound hands to make grabby hands at the other and Kurt chuckled. “Like what you see?” he asked, and again, Blaine nodded. He was starting to get the idea here. “Good boy,” Kurt said, leaning forward again to pepper Blaine’s chest with kisses, and shuffling forward just a bit so that his fully clothed cock pressed right into his boyfriend’s naked and erect one. Blaine groaned around the ball gag at just that little bit of friction.

The other had just lowered his hands to slowly remove his own pants, bringing them one step closer to where they were headed when he heard the handle on the door jiggle. It struck him at that moment that he had forgotten to relock the door, mainly due to being stunned by finding Blaine completely naked in front of him.

“Wait!” Kurt shouted, just as the door sprung open to reveal Santana and Brittany standing outside. Both men froze, as did the two women for just a moment.

“Wanky!” Santana said, smirking, clearly feeling that this might be great blackmail material in the future, even if Kurt and Blaine were the last couple she would ever want to blackmail. You couldn’t help but love them.

Blaine’s eyes had gone wide and they were alternating between the ball gag in his mouth and the two girls in the doorway.

“Dolphins!” Brittany clapped happily. Clearly, the blonde hadn’t grasped the severity of the situation. And clearly, neither woman was as humiliated as the men both were. “Sanny, can we play with the dolphins?”

Santana didn’t get a chance to answer because Kurt did it for her, finding his voice. “Oh no no no, no playtime with us.” He laughed a little nervously.

The Latina wrapped a hand around Brittany’s arm and very gently began to lead her back to the door. “No Brit Brit,” she said softly. “We can’t play with the dolphins right now. Besides, no offense to them because they both look like delicious fun, but I’m not really interested in sharing my playtime with them.”

It wasn’t just about wanting Brittany all to herself for Santana. Part of it was her way of an eye for an eye. Basically, she was repaying the favor for when Kurt had supported her after that fight with Sebastian in the race. One of her many ways of showing that she may be a bitch, but she was indeed grateful to him for not outing her. Especially when she wasn’t ready.

Kurt gave her a silent look of thanks, feeling like on some level, he and Santana understood each other in a way only two people from the same community could. He knew that Blaine would understand it just as well.

Santana threw the couple another smirk, for once being respectful by not taking an eyeful. Afterwards, she gently lead Brittany from the room, pulling the door shut behind her.

The two men stayed still for another moment before Blaine suddenly wriggled beneath Kurt, drawing the other man’s attention to the fact that the man beneath him was still hard, despite just having been walked in on by a couple of women.

It was enough to make Kurt forget that he should have gotten up to lock the door this time and he pulled the ball gag out of Blaine’s mouth for a moment, only so he could lean down and kiss him. He didn’t let it linger though, pulling away too soon for Blaine’s liking and the darker man whined in protest, already accustomed to not being able to actually talk. Kurt replaced the gag before he had a chance to realize it was really out.

Sitting back up, the taller man returned his hands to his pants, slowly undoing the belt and dropping it to the floor. Blaine whined beneath him, causing Kurt to smirk.

“Soon baby, very soon,” he said softly, moving his hands to the waist of his dress pants again, slowly unbuttoning them and pulling down the zipper.

Here was where things might have gotten tricky, but not for one Kurt Hummel, who had yet to show Blaine just how flexible he was.

He started to push both his pants and his underwear down, not moving from straddling the other man. Instead, he locked his eyes on Blaine and brought one leg up to rest on the arm of the chaise beside the other’s head. Blaine whined again, feeling the smoothness of Kurt’s skin against his arm, his wrists still above his head because he didn’t dare to move them.

The pale man halted a moment, before moving his other leg to rest on the other side of Blaine’s head. And then, he leaned forward into the stretch, pushing down his pants and underwear. Because of his position, the fabric rustled over Blaine, tickling at his skin as it passed down and finally, Kurt kicked the last of it off onto the floor behind the arm of the chaise. He was now just as naked as the man beneath him and slowly returned his legs to his previous position.

Blaine whined with need beneath him, head turning to spot the bottle of lube among the stuff on the floor. Kurt leaned over slowly and picked it up.

“Is this what you want sweetie?” he teased, shaking the bottle back and forth slightly. The curly haired man whined and nodded his head eagerly. “Is it really?” Kurt prodded. Blaine nodded his head even more eagerly, growling beneath the gag. He brought his bound hands forward and tried his best to plead with them. Kurt felt his cock get impossible harder.

But instead of popping the cap open on the bottle, he set it aside again and picked something else up. “Do you know what this is?” he asked as he held it up.

Blaine’s eyes went wide as they focused on the sex toy his boyfriend held in his hand. He was very aware of what the thing was, though no one had ever used one on him before. And he wasn’t sure he would let anyone else use one on him. But with Kurt, he felt secure enough to do anything and that included this particular kind of play.

“You wanted to beg, so I will make you beg for everything,” Kurt said. “Including your release.” He lowered his hand and gently took hold of Blaine’s cock, giving it a few good strokes and pulling another whine from the man beneath him, before sliding the toy, a cock ring, down the man’s shaft. Before he’d been with Blaine, Kurt would have never considered orgasm denial to be sexy, but something just brought out the animal in him when he was with the curly haired man.

This time, the two men were so focused on their actions, with Blaine whining and wiggling, and Kurt trying to hold him still. Blaine was in that whining and pleading state more now that he could feel Kurt’s cock rubbing against his own, which was now restricted from exploding. He wasn’t sure how long he would be able to stand it. He wondered if it was possible to get so hard, you managed to come even with the cock ring. He didn’t have time to figure it out.

The door suddenly opened a second time and it wasn’t until a startled cry filled the room that both men were alerted to it.

“Oh my God!” Burt Hummel stood stock still in the doorway, having just walked in on his son in a position he had never wanted to find him. Even with their torturing each other with tales from their sex lives. Hearing about it was one thing, something that Burt had come to be okay with these days. But actually seeing it…

Kurt felt his whole body heat up. There was absolutely nothing more mortifying than being walked in on by your parents. He was completely still and felt the blood drain from his cock as it rushed up to flush his face. He wasn’t hard anymore. And he could tell by where he was sitting, that neither was Blaine. The situation had effectively killed their erections. The pale man swallowed.

“Is that a cock ring?” came Carole’s voice. And Kurt found himself even more mortified that she seemed to not be embarrassed by the situation, but instead, intrigued. She was looking at the toy wrapped around Blaine’s cock with interest. “Maybe I ought to get one of those for you Burt, increase your stamina,” she added.

“Oh my God!” This time, it was Kurt who spoke the words. And this time, it was Burt who felt his face flush with heat.

An awkward silence hung in the room for a moment, broken only by Carole’s soft chuckle.

That was when Kurt seemed to remember himself. He carefully slid off of his boyfriend, his face still red, but now with anger, and grabbed his dress shirt to hold in front of himself.

“Out! OUT, OUT, OUT! GET OUT!” Kurt yelled. He hurried forward quickly, pressing his parents to back out of the room and then slammed the door and locked it behind them. Turning around to slide down to the floor against it, shutting his eyes.

Several beats of silence passed before Kurt started chuckling, the laughter growing, causing Blaine to stare at him like he was crazy for a moment, but the darker man held his wrists out and whined one more time.

That was all it took for Kurt to come down from his embarrassed laughter fit. He stood again and moved to unbind and ungag his boyfriend. Blaine turned on his side on the chaise.

“I think we’re both scarred for life,” he said. Kurt just nodded. So much for that private moment. Blaine just smiled at him. “You do realize that you have to go on the race with me now, just so we can have some privacy?”

Both men were silent for a moment, before bursting into giggles and getting dressed.

…

“Is that Hunter?” Kurt asked Finn a couple weeks later. His new stepbrother was staying with him in New York for a few days, supposedly so they could bond, though the taller man had spent more time with Rachel than him. The petite diva had rehearsal today, however, so Finn was hanging out with Kurt.

Finn had been channel surfing as Kurt prepared dinner, when he happened on a news station, and there on the screen was an all too familiar buzzcut. Kurt turned the volume up so they could hear the news story.

“...indicted on fraud and embezzlement charges. Clarington appears in this season of The Amazing Race, where rumor has it he caused quite a controversy, along with his teammate, Sebastian Smythe. The show airs tonight…”

Kurt flicked the TV off. “I wonder if that was why he cheated? To pay back the money he stole.”

His stepbrother only shrugged as they sat down to eat. “Did you hear about Jesse?” the younger man asked.

“No, what?” Kurt inquired.   


“He was kicked out of NYADA! They found out he’d been paying some kid with an IQ off the charts to do his academic work.”

Kurt smirked. “I bet Rachel is happy about that.”

Although Kurt hadn’t liked the woman very well while they had been on the race, he had gotten to know her a little better since she and Finn had been unofficially dating. She was still a spoiled diva, but his stepbrother seemed to have a calming effect on her, and she was slightly less annoying than before.

Finn gave him that goofy grin of his. “She might have been the one to let it slip to the admissions board.”

Kurt laughed as they focused on their food for a few minutes. “Have you heard from any of the other racers?” Finn asked.

Kurt nodded. “I saw Dave a few days ago. He was in town for his Good Morning America interview. He has a new boyfriend, that Totally Gay Warbler from Russia. They’ve been dating for a few months, apparently.”

“Cool,” Finn said, taking a bite of his stir fry. “So, what do you think about my mom and your dad going on the Amazing Race again?”

Kurt shrugged. He hadn’t told anyone that he and Blaine would be joining again as well. “I’m happy for them. I’m a little worried about my dad’s heart, but the doctor said everything was looking good. And apparently the race is less stressful than running for congress!”

His dad had announced his candidacy a few weeks after they’d returned, and while the polls showed him with a marginal lead, his opponent had launched a smear campaign, bringing up everything from Burt’s heart condition to Kurt’s sexuality. Burt had refused to be baited, though, and had run a campaign on facts and information.

The two men spent the rest of the evening just relaxing and talking, getting to know each other a little better. All in all, Kurt was glad their parents had gotten together. Finn wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed, but he was kind, and it was almost impossible not to like him.

…

The next six weeks seemed to fly by. Kurt had spent Christmas Eve and the day before in Michigan with Blaine and Cooper. Their parents were supposed to have been there, but had conveniently been summoned to some important meeting. In the Bahamas.

It had been nice spending two days practically glued to his boyfriend’s side, but it had been almost torture to leave again Christmas morning, but he had promised his dad he’d be home for Christmas Dinner with Carole and Finn. It had been really nice being home for those few days.   


On New Years Eve, he had been in Chicago for Mike and Tina’s wedding. It had been an interesting event; the bride wore black, not because of her goth style, but because it was the traditional wedding color in Korea, where Tina’s grandparents were originally from. She had agreed to have a traditional Asian wedding, but the reception was all goth, with a black, spider web draped cake, and smoking purple punch.

It was mid January now, and he was flying from New York to San Francisco, where he would meet Blaine to start the new season of The Amazing Race. He had no idea who else would be joining them, although when he’d talked to Marley, Phil’s PA, a few days ago, she had hinted that some of the racers might be familiar.

Blaine was waiting for him when he landed, along with Artie, the other PA he’d met last season.

“Gentlemen,” Artie said. “The shuttle bus is waiting to take you to the hotel. We’re doing things slightly different this time around. You’ll be meeting with Phil and the other racers this evening. I know we don’t usually allow you all to mingle before we start filming, but under the circumstances…”

The four eyed production assistant cut himself off. Kurt and Blaine looked at each other. "What circumstances?” Kurt asked.

The PA just grinned. “You’ll find out shortly. Let’s not keep everyone waiting.”

Burt and Carole were waiting beside the shuttle bus when they arrived, having just arrived from Columbus. Kurt had known about his dad and stepmother coming back, but Blaine was surprised to see them there. He smiled and hugged the elder Hummel and Carole.

“I’m so glad you two are going to be there too!” Blaine said, truly happy to see them, despite what happened the last time they had all been in the same place. Burt had flushed a little at the sight of him, but none of them mentioned the dressing room incident.

Artie urged them to board the shuttle, and once his wheelchair was locked into place, they pulled away from the curb.

The two couples chatted with each other and the PA, trying to get more information out of him, but the man would only grin and say “Wait and see.”

They pulled up at the hotel, and were led to a conference room, where they got their first surprise. Finn and Rachel were sitting at the long table, backpacks in front of them.

“Finn?” Carole said, shocked to see her son sitting there.

The tall man grinned sheepishly. “Hi mom!”

Kurt looked at the girl beside his stepbrother. “Rachel, what are you doing here? What about Fanny?”

Rachel shrugged and leaned into Finn. “What can I say, I’m in love! Besides, the producers are worried that now that last season has aired, numbers will drop. I got a really good review for my opening night. The last thing they want is for the attitude I had during that race to contradict peoples’ judgement of my character and cause them to decide not to come and see the show for themselves.” She paused a moment. “Also, I can better promote Broadway Bitches to the country from in front of a camera.”

Kurt rolled his eyes. He’d been pleased when the diva had started the doggy day care, even if it had been a publicity stunt to try and redeem her image before the race had aired, but the stunt had almost backfired when the woman had been dragged down the street by a pack of dogs.

He would have said something, but the conference room door opened again, and another couple entered. “Tina! Mike!” Kurt said, hugging the new arrivals. “I thought you were supposed to be on your honeymoon!”

The goth Asian girl laughed. “We are! We’re Honeymooning on the race! I can’t believe you all are here! Do you think everyone is coming back?”

Blaine laughed and hugged her too. “I doubt everyone will return,” he said, tactfully not mentioning Jesse in front of the Jewish Diva.   


Kurt nodded. “I know Dave and Azimio won’t be here. Azimio just got a walk on tryout with an NFL team, and Dave has been busy moving cross country to be with his boyfriend, the Totally Gay Warbler. I still have no clue what his name is.”

The door opened once more. “Mercedes! Sam!” Several voices called out, and more hugs were exchanged. Over the next half hour, three more teams arrived. Will and Emma, Nick and Jeff, and Santana, who had a new partner, Brittany.

“Where’s Quinn?” Kurt asked.

“She didn’t want to leave Beth again,” The Latina said. “And after Finn introduced her to his friend, Puck, at your dad’s wedding, they started dating.”

“That’s great!” Kurt said. “I wonder who else is going to be here?”

The door opened again, and this time it was the host who entered. “Hello everyone! Welcome back!”

There was a general chorus of greeting for the man, although Santana had something more specific in mind.

“So help me, Phil, if I so much as see a single piece of hay on this race, I’m going to shove it up your…”

“Anyway!” Kurt cut her off, “I get that since we all know each other already, there is no reason to keep us separated, but knowing the race as well as I do, I get the suspicion that this isn’t the only thing that has changed.”

Finn had been looking around the room at all the racers gathered there. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t we a few teams short?” he asked.

Phil smiled at both men. “You are correct, both of you. Let me introduce you to the other three teams. A couple of them may seem familiar to at least some of you! Gentlemen?”

Wes and David entered the room, and Blaine jumped to his feet to greet his two best friends. “You bastards! You didn’t tell me you were coming on the race!”

“We didn’t know you were going to be on this season!” David informed him.   


“We auditioned while you were filming last season!” Wes added.

Phil waved in the next team. Kurt noticed that Will seemed to be looking at the woman as if he recognized her, but wasn’t sure where from.

“Everyone, this is Terri Delmonico and Howard Bamboo, From Iowa City, Iowa.”

“Terri?” Will said. “Not the Terri Delmonico from The Honey Tones?”

The woman looked him over. “No way! You’re Will Schuester, from Fluid Sound!”

Emma frowned at the two of them. “You know each other?”

“Our show choirs competed against against each other back in high school,” Will said.

“I had the biggest crush on you back then,” Terri admitted.

“Oh, uh, thanks?” Will said, putting his arm around Emma’s shoulders.

There was an awkward silence for a moment, before Phil cleared his throat. “And our last team, from New York, Adam Crawford and Chandler Kiehl.”

Blaine felt Kurt stiffen beside him at the names. He glanced at the pale man who seemed to have gone even whiter. “Kurt?” Blaine asked in concern, taking a hold of his boyfriend’s hand, an action which for a moment, the other seemed oblivious of.

“Not again.” Kurt’s voice came out in a whisper.

Everyone in the room, except Burt, had stilled and turned to look at him, completely missing the moment the team walked in.

“What do you mean, not again?” Blaine asked.

Kurt finally moved, turning to look at the man next to him. “Last time, when my dad and I found out Karofsky and Azimio were on the race, I was scared because Karofsky had made my life a living hell. Now, I’m scared again, because running a race against those two will be a living hell.”

Blaine was quiet for a beat, not at all entirely sure what this meant. It was Adam who broke the silence.

“Hello Kurt,” he said. “I told you we would meet again, and the fates have brought us together once more.”

Chandler was quick to jump in. “Now, now Adam, how do you know the fates haven’t brought him back to me?” he asked, an oddly overly excited chirp to his voice. Chandler was the kind of person that seemed to get over excited about everything, whether it was negative or positive.

Kurt felt Blaine’s hand tighten just a bit and the curly haired man stood up and cleared his throat. “Fate hasn’t brought him to either of you. He’s with me,” he said, his tone firm and bordering on the edge of finality.”

Phil glanced from Kurt and Blaine to Adam and Chandler and back again. “Wait, you know them too?” he asked Kurt.

Kurt’s single three word sentence reply chilled the air in the room and several people threw up invisible walls of protection. “They’re my ex-boyfriends.”

Another awkward silence fell over the room, this time broken when the door opened again, and Phil’s assistant, Marley rushed in, whispering urgently to the host, who frowned, and then excused himself.

The moment he was out the door, nine pairs of eyes narrowed at the two new racers. Kurt couldn’t bring himself to look at the other two men.

Burt Hummel was the first to stand from the table. He knew very well what these two men had done to his son. Adam had seemed like a nice guy, the kind that was too good to be true, which was exactly what he was. Chandler, he had seemed like a nice guy too, until he proved to be the clingy type who would stop at nothing to make sure your admiration and attention was all about him.

The older Hummel cleared his throat. “If either of you comes anywhere near my son, I won’t hesitate to hit you upside the head with a tire iron.” His eyes narrowed in on Chandler. “And I know you don’t want that again.”

The shorter of the two men flinched and rubbed the back of his head.

Adam however, wasn’t phased. He narrowed his eyes right back at Burt. “As if they would allow you to bring one on the race,” he quipped.

Burt stood his ground. “Maybe not, but I ran this race once already, and I know for a fact anything is possible, and I wouldn’t doubt there’s a chance I can get my hands on one somewhere.”

The two men were quiet after that, as Burt sat back down beside Carole, who rubbed his back. But the rest of the racers weren’t done with Adam and Chandler it seemed.

“Ah hell to the no!” Mercedes bit out, hands on her hips as she stood from the table. “You two boys have obviously messed up that white boy’s life enough. You got some nerve coming in here and trying to get between my boy and his boo. I may not be a fighter, but I won’t hesitate to clock you one if I see any funny business.”

Before Adam or Chandler could respond, another voice piped up. “I’m from the wrong side of the tracks,” Santana stated, both hands resting palm flat on the table. “Now, the way I see it, you have two choices. You can leave Porcelain and his sexy hobbit alone, or I can crack one of your nuts, right or left. Your choice. Also, I have razor blades in my hair.” She leaned forward. “Oh, and if you think you’re going to sneak around with messing with them,” she added, bringing a hand up to tap her forehead. “My psychic Mexican third eye is watching you.”

Both men looked a little pale at the two women’s threats, but once again the door opened, and a rather harried Phil re-entered. “Okay, so apparently, we have another new team joining us this season. From Boca Raton, Sue and Becky.”

All the racers from the previous season looked to the door in shock as the tall blonde woman in the familiar tracksuit and the diminutive blonde girl in a cheerleading outfit burst into the room. The new racers obviously couldn’t see what the problem was.

“I’m on the race!” Becky cheered, blowing the whistle around her neck.

Santana stood up again. “What the hell are you doing here Sue?” It suddenly became apparent to all that they all had encountered the woman somewhere along the previous season.

Sue sneered at the lot of them. “Well Tweedle Fake Boobs, I’m afraid that information is classified. But I assure you and Tweedle Dumb over there, it has nothing to do with you.” She glanced around at the returning players.

“Wait,” Kurt said. “You actually know this woman? You didn’t just run into her somewhere?”

The blonde woman replied before Santana could get another word in. “Sandbags over there used to be the bottom of my pyramid. Perhaps if she hadn’t become Tweedle Fake Boobs, she would have been a high flyer rather than a hole digger.” Santana glared at the woman, who returned her gaze to the group as a whole. “Let’s see, other than Tweedle Fake Boobs, we have Frankenteen, Man Hands, Fish Lips, Aretha, Asian, Other Asian, Buttchin, Doe-Eyed Ginger, Baboon Heart Hummel, Donkey Wife, and Phineas and Ferb,” she noted, glancing at Nick and Jeff on the last one. “Am I missing anyone?”

Aside from the new people, and Kurt and Blaine, she had insulted every single person in the room.

“I see we’re missing Buttchin’s Diva son, Clariton, and Meerkat. Also Teen Mom isn’t here either.”

“Clarington’s in prison,” Kurt deadpanned.

“I knew I should have gotten to that strip search,” Sue commented, snapping her fingers.

Kurt frowned at the woman, still not sure what to make of her. Why had she given him that broach in India? And why were he and Blaine the only ones she hadn’t singled out besides the new teams?

Phil clapped his hands to get everyone’s attention. “Okay, so, there was a reason I wanted to bring you all in before we start the race.”

They all settled down at the table, and turned to the host. “First off, you need to know that there will be some changes to the way things are going to happen. The rules regarding penalties for non elimination legs are different, although I won’t reveal exactly what changes have been made until they come up on the race.”

The teams exchanged looks, wondering what exactly would be required of them if they had the misfortune of coming in last on a non elimination.

“Also, since we have an extra team this year,” he glanced uneasily at Sue and Becky, “there will be a double elimination at some point. Again, we won’t announce exactly when until the beginning of that leg.”

There were a few murmurs at this, but for the most part they all seemed to agree with this change. Once they settled down, Phil continued. “There will be some other surprises along the way, so be prepared for anything. We’ll begin tomorrow morning, and you will receive your first surprise at the starting line. Any questions?”

No one said anything, and Phil nodded. “Okay, the production assistants will show you to your rooms. I suggest you all get some rest. Tomorrow is going to be a very busy day for you all.”

Once alone in their room, Kurt backed Blaine up to the bed, kissing him hard. “Finally!” he said.

Blaine laughed. “Yes. Finally! Alone. You know what this means?”

Kurt grinned. “Are you thinking the same thing I am?”

“That depends on what you are thinking?”

“That I get to be Big Spoon.”

Blaine laughed, and soon both men were sound asleep, wrapped in each other’s arms.

…

They arrived at the base of Lombard Street shortly before eleven the next morning, and lined up as instructed, looking up at Phil, who smiled at all of them in return.

“Well, here we go again! Are you all ready for this?”

After a chorus of yeses. Phil continued.

“Behind me is Lombard Street, known as the crookedest street in the world. When I give the signal, you will race to the top of the street to where your packs and first clue are waiting for you. Once you collect them, you will have to find your own way on public transportation to San Francisco International. And,” he paused, dramatically, “The first team to check in for the first flight to your first destination will receive a surprise!”

An excited murmur went through the racers. “Racers Ready! Stay safe!”

The twelve teams all hunched into position to take off, twenty four pairs of eyes narrowed in focus.

Phil glanced around at them once more…“GO!”


	2. They Love Me Here

Kurt would think that he’d be used to staying in strange places by now. But to be fair, they didn’t often actually stay in a building on the race. And there was something that felt more exposed about staying in Phil’s home. As much as he wanted to get close to Blaine there, both of them had the same thought. They would feel incredibly guilty for treading on the kindness of the show’s host’s family. Kurt was the first to admit he actually did like getting down and dirty, but not that dirty.

He was about to find out, unexpectedly, that others didn’t necessarily have the same guilty feelings.

“Blaine?” the pale man whispered, gently shaking his boyfriend. The other man groaned and rolled over to face him, blinking his eyes open and looking at Kurt with that adorably sleep fussed face. Half his curls stuck up because he hadn’t managed to get all the gel out before bed and Kurt had to bite down on his lip to keep from laughing. Blaine looked ridiculously adorable.

“Are you okay?” the shorter man asked, voice tinged with sleep and slurring just a little because he wasn’t fully awake.

Kurt bit his lip again, blushing lightly. “I need to go to the bathroom,” he whispered, a little embarrassed that he was waking Blaine up for this.

“So go silly,” Blaine chuckled sleepily.

“I’m not sure I can remember how to find it in the dark,” Kurt admitted. “Would you pretty please come with me?”

Blaine, who never seemed to be irritated with any kind of request that could inconvenience him, smiled at his boyfriend and sat up reluctantly, though he was only reluctant to leave Kurt’s arms. “Okay,” he said, yawning.

“Thank you,” the taller man replied, sitting up and sliding out of the bed. The two of them were fully dressed in pajamas, wanting to be courteous to the members of Phil’s family who were there on the ranch.

As Blaine came around the bed, Kurt slipped his hand into his and the two of them set off in search of the bathroom, padding quietly down the hallway in their bare feet.

After a few moments, Kurt tried a door. It was locked. “Must not be that one,” he whispered. Blaine kissed his cheek and tried the door on the opposite side of the hallway. It revealed a linen closet.

“I don’t think a toilet can fit in there,” Blaine said, causing Kurt to smack his arm playfully. Getting more serious, he added, “I wish I’d remembered to bring a flashlight. It’s pretty dark in this hallway at night.”

Kurt frowned. “That’s because ranches aren’t really surrounded by streetlamps. All we’ve got is the moon.” He pointed to the window at the end of the hall behind them with his free hand. The two of them continued along the hallway, Kurt running the fingers of his free hand along the wall until they skimmed across another door. “This has to be it,” he said quietly.

The pale man wrapped his hand around the handle and turned it easily. It wasn’t locked, so that was a good sign. However, the first thing he heard next, certainly was not a good sign.

“On your knees and beg for it!” Kurt blanched at the command. The voice sounded very much like Carole’s, but he had never heard his new stepmother sound so forceful before. He hesitated a moment, with the door open only a crack. Though he had been able to clearly hear what she’d said, it still sounded muffled so he thought that it was coming from somewhere nearby and decided he needed to try and block it out.

“What was that?” Blaine whispered. He’d heard something, but not as clearly as Kurt.

Kurt turned and looked at him. “I think it was my stepmother,” he admitted.

“Oh,” Blaine said. “What is she doing awake at this hour?”

The older man shrugged and gripping Blaine’s hand just a bit tighter, he remembered he was here to use the bathroom. So he turned back to the door to push it the rest of the way open. And that was when he went stalk still frozen for the second time in the past few months.

“Oh my Gaga,” he got out in a voice that was somewhere between a whisper and normal volume.

The two people in the room hesitated as they realized they were no longer alone. And it was a tableau Kurt knew he was never going to get out of his head again. He could feel Blaine squeeze his hand and he was sure his boyfriend had just noticed the scene.

In the middle of the room, Burt Hummel was kneeling on the bed, wearing nothing but a pair of shorts, and his hind quarters facing his wife. Carole stood a few steps to the side of the bed, dressed in a much too revealing leather suit, with fishnets and knee high boots. In one of her gloved hands, she held a whip.

“Blaine?” Kurt said in a whimper, as his parents stared at them in horror, completely thrown off to be caught in such a compromising situation.

“Yes?” Blaine replied in a voice that was almost not even there. It was no surprise that he was just as embarrassed and shocked as Kurt was.

“I don’t have to pee anymore.” Kurt was still whimpering.

“Why?” the curly haired man seemed to have to ask.

Kurt swallowed. “Because it’s running down my leg.”

Carole, to no surprise, seemed to be the first one to recover herself. Out of the four of them, she was the one who was so easy to go along with it. When Kurt had asked her how she adjusted to situations so well, she’d told him something about playing into and making light of your embarrassment. It makes it easier to handle.

“Did you boys need something?” she asked after a moment. Her hesitancy in speaking suggested she may have been about to say something else, but Kurt wasn’t sure he wanted to know what it was.

The pale man swallowed again and hastily shook his head. “No!” he spit out. “No, I’m good. We’re good.” he hastened to pull the door shut again as he and Blaine backed out of the room. “I have never been so mortified in my entire life,” he muttered after the door was safely shut.

Blaine, ever the one to make light out of situations, was quick to respond. “Look on the bright side,” he said. “Next time your dad berates you for not locking the door, you can retort with, ‘Look who’s talking.’”

“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” Kurt replied.

The other man chuckled lightly. “Come on. Let’s go really find the bathroom so you can clean up.”

Kurt nodded, grateful that Blaine was not going to give him a hard time about his less than graceful urge to relieve his bladder.

As the two of them were making their way back to their room a short while later, Kurt thought he noticed someone dart across an intersection in the hallway. He stopped, and looked down the adjoining hallway, but it was too dark to see anything.

“Did you see that?” he asked.

“See what?”

“I thought I just saw someone dart down the other hall.”

Blaine smiled gently. “Love, I think you need more sleep. Come on,” he said, gently guiding him away from the intersection.

…

Hidden in a shadow at the end of the hall Kurt had just glanced down, a form dressed head to toe in black waited a moment until they were certain the other two were safely behind their bedroom door, before slipping out the window at the end of the corridor.

…

For several moments after Kurt and Blaine had backed out, Burt and Carole didn’t move. Even if she had shown herself to be calm and collected, Carole was still just as mortified as her stepson and his boyfriend probably were. She was well aware of her husband joking about old people sex with his son, but she was pretty sure this incident might drop that kind of thing to a bare minimum. Burt wouldn’t be able to crack jokes like that with Kurt, without getting a little red in the face.

“I don’t know what’s worse,” Carole finally said. “Us walking in on them about to have sex, or them walking in on us roleplaying this way.” The outfit had been a gag gift from one of her coworkers when they found out she was getting married again. She had never intended to wear it, but her friend had apparently slipped it into the bottom of her backpack when she had visited just before they had left for San Francisco. Burt had discovered it as they got ready for bed, and had teased her about it.

Burt was silent for several more beats, apparently not knowing how to answer her observation. She didn’t blame him for being unable to find the words. While he hadn’t been in the most compromising position possible for this scene, he was definitely in a position he hoped his son would never have to see. Some things were meant to stay private, regardless of how far the jokes went.

When Burt finally did speak, he said something Carole had not been expecting him to say at all.

“We made Kurt pee his pants.”

There was another beat following the statement before both of them burst into fits of laughter. Perhaps it was not something they should be laughing about, but the mere situation being topped off with such a statement was too hilarious not to laugh about.

“Next time,” Carole started, when they had exhausted their laughing fit. “We’re locking the door.”

“Or the tent flap,” Burt added. And they both burst into laughter again.

…

Their alarm clock went off at an ungodly hour of the morning, and Kurt groaned and rolled over to shut it off. It had taken him forever to get back to sleep after the night’s misadventures. Every time he closed his eyes, an image of his stepmother in that dominatrix getup had him cringing.

Kurt was hardly a prude, he’d dabbled a little in BDSM, though nothing hardcore, just a little roleplay to spice things up. And he knew his dad wasn’t prudish, either, he’d just never wanted to think about his dad having sex of any kind. What kid did? Parents were supposed to be boring and sexless.

“Did you get any sleep?” Blaine asked from beside him.

“Not really. You?”

“Not a wink. I doubt I’ll be able to sleep ever again.”

Kurt sighed. “We should get dressed and get breakfast. Our Pit Start is in ninety minutes.”

Twenty minutes later, showered, dressed and coiffed, Kurt headed to the dining room, but stopped short as he almost bumped into Carole as she came out of their room. 

“Oh, good morning, Kurt,” Carole said, a slightly awkward tone to her voice. She looked much more like Carole this morning and much less like Elvira and Jessica Rabbit had a child together.

“Uh, good morning, Carole. Did you sleep well?” The words were out of his mouth before he could really think about it, and he felt his cheeks flame.

To her credit, Carole decided the best course of action was to try and move forward like nothing had happened. The last thing she wanted to do was to call more attention to Kurt’s embarrassment. “I did. The bed was quite comfortable. How about you sweetheart?” she asked.

Kurt tried to act as normal as possible. “I guess it was okay. We should get to breakfast. You guys are leaving before us.”

Carole nodded. “Right.” She wanted to hug her stepson, but she wasn’t oblivious to the awkward tension that hung in the air and so decided now was not the best time, unless Kurt decided to instigate it himself. “Well, I guess if we don’t see you after breakfast, we’ll see you on the course.”

Kurt nodded. “Of course. Good luck!”

They entered the dining room, where Phil’s mom had set up a large breakfast buffet for the racers. Kurt was only mildly surprised to find Phil himself sitting at the table.

“I thought you’d have already been on a plane to wherever we’re heading next,” Carole said, taking a seat between the host and her husband.

The handsome man just smiled at her. “I’ll be leaving in a few minutes. Just enjoying being home a little longer.”

“Care to give us any hints on our next destination?” Kurt asked, teasingly, the awkward feeling having left as he sat with Blaine, Nick and Jeff across the table.

Phil laughed. “Sorry, no spoilers!” He stood as Marley entered the room with her bag packed. He bid them farewell and followed his PA out.

“He’s really cool,” Jeff said. “And totally hot. It’s such a shame he’s straight. And Married.” All four gay men nodded, eyeing each other before giggling. 

Wes and David entered then, looking rushed, which reminded Kurt that the two of them would be leaving soon after his dad and stepmother. “Why are you late?”

David frowned, and Wes seemed a little green around the gills. “Let’s just say we didn’t get much sleep.”

Kurt frowned. “Why not?”

“Santana and Brittany were in the room next to us, and they...uh, got a little vocal.” David said.

Kurt’s eyebrow almost disappeared at this news. Were he and Blaine the only couple who had refrained from any form of hanky panky last night?

The shorter blonde PA, Kitty entered then. “Ten minutes to Pit Start, Burt and Carole, and twelve minutes for Wes and David. Make sure you have your bags ready to go. Kurt and Blaine, you have thirty minutes. Have you seen Santana and Brittany? They’re supposed to leave five minutes after you?”

“We’re here!” The Latina called out from the doorway as she and her partner made their way over to the Buffet. “We’ll be ready to go as soon as we finish eating.” 

Kurt noticed Wes and David glancing at each other with rather embarrassed expressions on their faces. He could feel their pain. Perhaps it had been an unfortunate night for several people.

…

_ “This sprawling ranch in Lincoln, New Zealand, a satellite town of Christchurch, is where I grew up, and was the first Pit Stop in a race around the world. The eleven teams waiting here have no idea what’s in store for them. _

_ “Burt and Carole, who were the first to check in at 4:33 pm, will depart at 4:33 am.” _

…

Burt waited for the PA to give him the signal before ripping open their clue and reading it out loud.

“Fly to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia!”

“Malaysia!” Carole exclaimed, hugging Burt. “That’s one of the places we both said we wanted to go!”

They rushed off to where they’d left their marked car, quickly loading their backpacks into the trunk and getting in, Burt behind the wheel, and Carole behind him with the map. 

It wasn’t a long drive to the airport, and when they arrived, they went straight to Malaysia Airways. They booked tickets on the earliest flight, noting that only a few teams were likely to make the same flight.

As they made their way through security and to the boarding gate, they talked about what had happened the night before.

“I found a box and packed up the outfit this morning,” Carole said. “Madison agreed to mail it back home for us, no questions asked.”

Burt grinned. “Such a shame. You looked hot in it. But, yeah, maybe it would be better to save it and indulge in that type of thing at home, where there aren’t as many people who can accidentally walk in on us.”

His wife laughed. “Remind me to thank Jen again when we get back.”

Wes and David joined them a short time later, and the camera crews sat with them, the cameras off for the moment so they could join in the conversation.

“So, are the rumors true?” Ryder, one of the soundmen, asked.

The four racers exchanged a look. They were all in on the plan, of course, but weren’t sure exactly how much the crew knew.

“Our lips are sealed,” Wes said, spying Kurt and Blaine making their way towards them.

…

Kurt tried to stifle a yawn as he and Blaine made their way through the security checkpoint. He’d had a couple of cups of coffee with breakfast, but still felt like a walking zombie. The good news was, it was an almost thirteen hour flight. He was sure he’d be able to get some sleep on the plane, as long as he didn’t think about...That.

As they made their way along the concourse to their gate, Kurt noticed a woman sitting on one of the benches. She appeared to be crying. It took him a moment to recognize her as the woman he’d complimented at the airport in San Francisco. 

He paused. “Is everything okay?”

She glanced up at him, and seemed to recognize him as well. “Oh! I just don’t know what to do! I’m on my way to Australia for a wedding, but had such a long layover here, I stayed at a hotel last night, and when I woke up this morning, I discovered someone had broken into my hotel room and stolen my diamond pendant!”

“Oh, no!” Blaine said, “Not the one your grandson and his boyfriend gave you?”

She nodded. “I reported it to the police, but they said there really wasn’t much they can do about it, unless they catch someone trying to pawn it, and now my flight is due to leave in an hour! And it’s my grandson’s wedding! He’s going to be so upset”

“I’m so sorry!” Kurt said, hugging her. “I’m Kurt, by the way, and this is my boyfriend, Blaine. I hope the police find your necklace! They have your address and phone number, yes?”

She nodded, accepting the tissue from the small pack Blaine held out for her. “I’m Agnes, and yes. They assured me that if they recover it, they will send it to me.”

Kurt exchanged email addresses with her and asked her to let him know if they were able to recover it. “And tell your grandson congratulations!”

They continued on to their gate, Kurt lost in thought. It sucked that people felt the need to take things that didn’t belong to them. It made him think about Sebastian, who tried to take Blaine from him.

…

_ “It really makes me angry when people take things that don’t belong to them. Especially things that have great sentimental value. After my mom died, I kept some of her jewelry, including a butterfly brooch with emeralds and sapphires that my dad had bought her for their fifth wedding anniversary, because he thought the gems matched her eyes. After I moved to New York, someone stole it from my desk at work. _

_ “The sentimental value of that brooch was greater than any amount of money, and I despise who ever took it!” _

_ Blaine hugged him as he looked at the camera. “People who steal from others rather than working a real job are pathetic. I hope they catch whoever stole Agnes’ pendant and recover it for her. If you are watching this, you worthless excuse for a human, shame on you!” _

_ ... _

Thinking of the Meerkat reminded Kurt of the airport the day before, when he had thought he had seen the other man. Some people just didn’t understand the meaning of No.

…

“It feels weird,” Will said as he waited for the PA to signal him to open the clue.

“What feels weird?” Emma asked, leaning against his side.

He smiled down at his redheaded fiance. “Waiting to leave the Pit Stop. We never got to experience this last time, since we were eliminated first. We made it through the first leg of the race this time, and we aren’t at the back of the pack!”

The elven woman smiled up at him. “I know, it almost feels like a dream! I’m almost afraid to blink, worried it will all vanish if I’m not looking!”

Will leaned over and kissed her just as the PA gave them their cue.

...

_ “All teams are now traveling to Kuala Lumpur on one of three flights. On the first flight are Burt and Carole, Wes and David, Kurt and Blaine, and Santana and Brittany. The second flight has Nick and Jeff, Sue and Becky, Tina and Mike, and Will and Emma. And the final flight carries Adam and Chandler, Finn and Rachel, and Sam and Mercedes. _

_ “Once they’ve landed, they must make their way to Taman Connaught Night Market, and search for their next clue.” _

…

Sue snapped her little black book shut. Not the one she kept her booty calls in, though she was sure Putin was awaiting her next call eagerly. She turned to Becky. “At ease Becky,” she said to the girl.

The blonde in the cheerleading uniform looked back at Sue. “Now what?” she asked. “I thought you said The Amazing Race was an abomination.”

“Sometimes Becky Jackson, you need to join your powerful enemas to beat them. Now according to my calculations, that diamond has more value than my mummified hand of Margaret Thatcher.”

“What about toast?” Becky asked. “Does it have double the value of bread because you have to cook it again? Is that why it makes sense? Because I still don’t get it.”

Sue patted Becky’s hand. “Oh Becky, toast has no business in this world. Especially when it’s used as ammo for one Sue Sylvester and her handicapable sister at a screening of Rocky Horror.”

“Rocky Horror is an abomination.” Becky turned around in her aisle seat to look at the team behind them, which happened to be Will and Emma. “Give me chocolate or I will cut you.”

Will and Emma stared at the girl in surprise, not at all sure where that had come from, and not sure how to respond to it either.

“Um, sorry Becky,” Will said. “We don’t have any chocolate.”

“What a rip off!” the girl cried, turning back around in her seat.

“Becky, if our suspect keeps leaving a trail, they’ll find themselves in the Sueshank Redemption.”

Becky looked confused. “I thought it was the Shawshank Redemption.”

“I said it first. And I’m pretty sure Stephen King got his title from one Sue Sylvestor. I should sue for copyright.”

The blonde girl was even more confused now. “How do you copy right?” she asked.

Sue patted her hand again. “Oh Becky, your innocence is outstanding.”

…

Finn kept glancing back to where Adam and Chandler were sitting behind him on the third plane, a frown on his face. There was something about the pair that made him uncomfortable. It wasn’t the fact that they were gay. He was used to that by now, having known Kurt and Blaine for almost a year. It was true that until he’d gone on the race with his mom the season before, he had never met a gay person before, at least as far as he knew.

He’d been a little awkward around the two men at first, not knowing how to act, but once he’d gotten to know them, he’d felt more relaxed. Now it didn’t bother him at all when he met other gay people.

No, it was something else about those two that had him on alert. He didn’t think they would hurt Kurt, at least not physically, though they might cause him some emotional distress. If they did, though, they’d be sorry. Finn would only be the first one in line to kick their asses. There would be a dozen others behind him to pick up the pieces and shred them again.

With a sigh he turned back around in his seat as Rachel patted his arm. “I don’t like those two,” He muttered.

From across the aisle, Mercedes nodded. “We can’t let them mess things up. We’ll just have to keep an eye on them.”

Sam agreed. “There are more of us than them. Even if some of us get eliminated, there will still be someone to make sure everything works out.”

Finn sighed again. He’d never had a brother before, but there was something about Kurt that just made him want to protect the pale man. Not that he thought Kurt was weak or couldn’t protect himself. Finn knew for a fact that Kurt was a lot stronger than people gave him credit for. And he knew Blaine knew how to fight, he’d seen it first hand the day after his mom’s wedding. They had gone to the gym to work out, and Blaine had done some sparring in the ring. For such a small guy, Blaine carried quite a punch.

Finn almost wished Adam and Chandler would try something, just to see the two men get their asses handed to them by all the people who would beat the crap out of them for trying.

…

“I’ve found the clue box!” Carole called out, and Kurt turned to look where she was running, spotting the familiar red and yellow flag. He and Blaine changed direction, along with Wes and David and Santana and Brittany, and they each grabbed a clue, tearing it open and reading out loud.

“Detour! Stand or Deliver?”

…

_ “In this Detour, teams must choose between two common trades found in Kuala Lumpur’s night market. In Stand, teams must assemble one of the portable seller stalls and sell enough t shirts and sunglasses to earn approximately twenty US dollars to receive their next clue.” _

_ “In Deliver, teams must collect ten handbags from the marked stall, and then search among the other stalls until they find the vendor selling the same bags as theirs. Once they deliver the bags to the correct vendor, they will receive their next clue.” _

…

“I think we should do Deliver,” Blaine said, and Kurt nodded.

“We’re going to do Stand, I think,” Carole said. 

“Okay, good luck!”

As Kurt and Blaine searched for the marked stall, they were joined by Wes and David, who had chosen the same Detour, while Santana and Brittany had apparently chosen Stand. They found the handbags, and each man collected five bags, and began searching the stalls for matching bags.

They still hadn’t found any matching bags by the sixth stall, but something caught Kurt’s eye. He pointed it out to Blaine. It was a T shirt that had ‘Likes Boys’ written on it.

Blaine laughed. “You should totally buy that!”

Kurt had to admit that he was so tempted to buy the shirt. But they were not in a place where they could spend extra money. Nor did they have time to dawdle because they were currently in racing mode. It wasn’t like when they got to India and had time to kill.

“Maybe I’ll come back and get it when we aren’t racing or something,” he said sadly.

Blaine shook his head. “There’s no telling whether it would still be there.”

Kurt frowned. He knew his boyfriend was right. “Well, I’ll keep an eye out for the bags in the area while I go look at the shirt. See if it’s even my size.”

His boyfriend chuckled and watched Kurt as he swayed off through the crowd, keeping one eye on him to make sure he didn’t lose him as he continued to search for the match to their bags.

However, his eye on Kurt did not stay long before it caught sight of something, or rather someone else in the crowd. A familiar tall man with a smirky meerkat face crossed the path Kurt had taken to look at the shirt and stopped for a moment right in the middle. Blaine could feel his eyes boring into him and the tension in his shoulders started to rise. He only had one thought. Get the hell out of there.

He was about to call for Kurt when the meerkat blew him a kiss and Blaine squeezed his eyes shut, shaking his head and telling himself he wasn’t there. When he opened his eyes again, the man was nowhere to be seen and Blaine felt that maybe he had just been imagining it. But the tension still settled around his shoulders.

“Kurt!” he called out. “Come on! We’ll come back and get it! I promise!” He really just wanted to get out of there. “Let’s just find the right stall so we can move on!”

The pale man came back to him, a look of concern on his face. “Blaine?” he questioned. “Are you okay.”

“Fine!” the curly haired man replied. “I just...really have to pee,” he thought up quickly, making a motion like he was dancing with need.

Kurt felt a little embarrassed as he remembered wetting himself the night before, and nodded. “Okay, sweetie. There was a bathroom back that way a little bit. Hand me the bags and I’ll wait here.”

Blaine handed the bags over. He didn’t really have to go that bad, but he needed to instill a sense of urgency to get moving without Kurt finding out what really had him so wound up. He decided to go use the restroom anyway.

“Thank you,” he said, pecking Kurt’s lips and hurrying towards the restroom.

…

_ “To say that I panicked when I saw Sebastian in the crowd would be an understatement. I still have nightmares about that man. I haven’t told Kurt, or anyone else, but having Sebastian come on so strong on the last race brought back some really bad memories. _

_ “Back in high school, after the attack at the Sadie Hawkins Dance, I transferred to a new school. After everyone found out I was gay, one of the TAs made a pass at me, and got out of hand. I fought him off, and he never tried again, but I was too ashamed to tell anyone at the time. _

_ Having Sebastian constantly pushing himself at me made me feel so dirty, just like I was that kid in high school again.” _

_ ... _

As Kurt waited, he spotted the teams from the second and third flights arriving at the clue box. Had they already been here long enough for the other teams to catch up? He noticed Adam and Chandler heading in his direction, and hoped they hadn’t noticed him. He stepped into the stall next to the bathroom, trying to blend in.

He pretended to be browsing the merchandise, when he noticed the watch one of the other customers was wearing. “Is that a Patek Watch?” he asked.

The other man glanced over at him, and smiled. “Yes, it is!”

Kurt nodded. “I thought so. I wrote an article about that particular style just a few weeks ago. It’ll be in this month’s Vogue issue. It’s very nice!”

“Thank you! I’ll have to check out that article!” The man said.

Kurt grinned. “Just look for the Kurt Hummel Byline.”

“I’ll do that!”

“Kurt?” He heard Blaine call out, sounding just slightly panicky.

“Over here!” He gave the older gentleman another smile before going out to meet his boyfriend.

“Kurt! Blaine! Over here!” Wes called out. “We found your bags!”

…

“Damn it, where are those two going?” David asked, looking back towards Kurt and Blaine, who seemed to have stopped to window shop. “Don’t they realize they are in a competition?”

Wes shook his head. “Come on, let’s see if we can find their bags and hurry them along.”

They spotted the stall with their own bags, but passed it by for the moment, knowing they could come back and quickly get their clue once they found the other team’s bags. It only took a couple more minutes to find the other stall, and Wes called out to the other team.

As the two men caught up to them, Wes noticed that Blaine seemed to be distracted, but the shorter man just shrugged it off when he asked him about it.

…

“Great job, Honey!” Tina said, as Mike made another sale. Her husband spoke several languages, including Malay and Mandarin, two dialects that were common in this region. His ability to speak their language had helped them not only catch up to the teams on the first flight, but pass them, and they quickly completed the task.

Mike grinned at her. “They love me here!”

They handed over the money they had earned, and received their clue, noticing that both Burt and Finn seemed to be having difficulty getting people to buy from them. People were intimidated by Finn’s height, while Burt was just too much of a novelty with his ball cap and joking nature.

Mike took pity on them, and called out to the crowd in Malay that the two men were his friends, and they needed people to buy their goods. That encouraged a few people to approach the two men and their partners to browse through their goods.

Tina hugged him, and then opened their clue and read it out loud.

“Make your way to Aquaria KLCC, and search for your next clue.”

…

Kurt sighed as he spotted the sign in front of the Aquarium. “Of course it’s closed until morning.”

Blaine laughed. “So, what do you want to do now?”

Kurt thought about it for a moment. It was still fairly early, only a little after eight. Too soon to try and set up their sleeping bags. “We could go back to the market and look around. Maybe I can buy that shirt.”

Blaine hesitated. He still wasn’t certain if he had actually seen Sebastian, or if it had been his mind playing tricks on him. But if he showed reluctance to return, Kurt would wonder why, and Blaine didn’t think he could lie to him again about the incident.

“Okay, just don’t break the bank!”

The pale man smiled and kissed his cheek. “I promise not to buy anything but the shirt, unless it’s food or something we absolutely need.”

They began to make their way back to the market, which was within walking distance of the aquarium.

Kurt was happy to find that not only was the shirt still there, but it was exactly his size, and the price was less than two US dollars! They browsed some of the other stalls, purchasing some fruit for their breakfast the next morning, and some snacks to carry them through the next leg of the race. 

As they were making their way back towards the aquarium, Kurt noticed the older gentleman he had spoken with earlier, only now the man was conferring with what looked like a pair of police officers. He wondered what was up, but decided not to interrupt whatever was happening.

By the time they returned to the aquarium, most of the teams were setting up their sleeping bags, although he noticed at least two teams were absent, Sue and Becky and Adam and Chandler. He wasn’t too upset about the last two, but Sue’s absence was very suspicious.

…

Things were starting to quiet down a bit as Wes settled into his sleeping bag and opened a book that he had bought at one of the stands. He was using a flashlight to read by. David had gone off to relieve himself about two minutes prior. The Asian man had just gotten comfortable when he heard it.

A noise like rustling. He looked up and shone his flashlight around the area, but didn’t really note any nearby bushes. Not any that something could be hiding in anyway. And why would there be? They were in front of an aquarium.

He pulled himself back up into a proper sitting position and shown the flashlight around just enough that he could make out the other teams, but not so much that he would disturb anybody. It didn’t seem to be any of them so his next thought was that it was David, trying to get a jump out of him for kicks. He wouldn’t put it past the man to do that.

“David?” he called out in a loud whisper. “David, you can come out now! I caught you.” He wasn’t even sure which direction the sound was coming from, but when his best friend didn’t jump out and snap his fingers in defeat, he started to second guess himself.

That was when he heard a new noise, something that undeniably wasn’t the sound of someone trying to scare the living out of someone else. Against his better judgment, Wes got out of the sleeping bag and started to gravitate towards the sound, listening hard to pick up the path.

He found himself surprised when it lead him a little ways away from the front to the aquarium and off to the side, a bit towards the back, though he hadn’t thought anyone could get around back there. He came to a stop at a gate and pressed his ear to it. The sounds were definitely coming from beyond the gate. He was just about to make a note to tell someone in the morning that there were trespassers on the property when he heard a very distinct moan.

“Dear sweet gavels of court,” Wes muttered. He knew that moan was not the sound of someone who was hurting. He felt his ears go warm and he was rooted to the spot, now listening to what he was ninety-nine percent sure was a couple getting intimate. But if everyone else was accounted for back at their camp, who was that behind the gate?

“Whatcha listening to?” came a voice from behind him, causing Wes to jump. He turned his wide startled eyes to the person and found David standing there with his own flashlight.

“Geezus David, don’t do that!” Wes cried in a loud whisper.

David shrugged. “Sorry. But what are you doing all the way over here?” he asked.

Wes tapped a finger to his lips and pointed at the gate. Both men stopped and listened for a moment and David’s eyes became wide with realization as well. He sheepishly rubbed at the back of his neck.

“Maybe we should go before the couple berates us tomorrow for interrupting their private time?” the darker man suggested.

The Asian man shook his head. “Um David…” he started, not particularly sure how to tell him. “Everyone on the race is accounted for back at camp.”

David went silent. He flipped his own flashlight from Wes’ face to the gate and back to Wes’ face again, as though he thought he was having him on. But Wes had never really been the kind to joke around, especially not about that kind of thing. It was only a moment after this realization that David grabbed his friend’s hand and walked back to the camp so quickly Wes had to jog to keep up.

All seemed quiet in the camp as they got back, neither man wanting to discuss the lovemaking trespassers on the other side of the gate. They hastened to get back into their sleeping bags and while he was tired, Wes decided to go on with his reading anyway. Anything to get what had just happened out of his mind.

It was sometime later when Wes was awoken by another sound. He wasn’t sure when he had even fallen asleep, but his book had toppled out of his hand and landed on the ground beside him. He didn’t remember what page he’d been on. He sighed in frustration.

“Quiet!” whispered a voice from beside him and Wes turned to find David was wide awake in his own sleeping bag. Wes gave him a confused look.

And then he heard it again. A moaning sound. Only this time, it was coming from somewhere in the camp. Wes tightened his grip on his sleeping bag and let out a low groan. What was up with all these couples and their desire to get busy surrounded by other people?

“Faster Jeffy!” The moaning was broken by a now familiar voice, crying out, only to resume moaning afterward.

“Shhhh, Nicky,” said another voice. “If you’re too loud, you’ll wake everyone else. And I’m not interested in our friends knowing what you sound like when you climax.”

Wes and David both went still. They wondered if they should call attention to the fact that the couple had an audience. They didn’t have to though, because someone else did.

“Wanky!” came the familiar shout from the fiery Latina. After the night before at Phil’s family’s ranch, she was the last person Wes and David wanted to hear calling attention to someone else getting freaky.

“Should we say something?” David whispered to Wes then. The Asian man shook his head. He turned away from David, because whether he wanted to admit it or not, all this loving was starting to affect him in a way that made him wish he hadn’t broken up with Courtney. “Are you okay?” David whispered next. Wes just shook his head again. David knew better than to question him.

In any case, silence had risen after Santana’s exclamation. It was apparent that Nick and Jeff had stilled at the fact someone had overheard them. The silence lasted long enough for Wes to drift back to sleep without a word. But poor David was left trying to sleep while hearing the two boyfriends decided to finish what they started.

…

As they packed up their sleeping bags and got ready to start the day, there was a little bit of awkwardness between the teams. They were all adults, they all understood that sometimes people needed a release. They seemed to have an unspoken agreement among themselves not to bring up what had happened the night before, but that meant that they were stretched for conversation.

When the doors finally opened and the race was back on, there was almost a collective sigh of relief that they had something else to focus on. They rushed through the doors and searched for the clue box. Kurt and Blaine were the first to spot it, and grab their clue, but the others were right behind them. Burt took their clue and opened it quickly.

“Hungry eyes are watching you, better feed them before they eat the clue.”

“Sounds ominous,” Carole said.

“I think it means we’re feeding the sharks,” Kurt said. 

They were all lead to changing rooms, where wetsuits were laid out for each of them. Burt had never worn a wetsuit before, and had trouble getting the neoprene on. Most of the other teams had finished dressing and moved on to the task by the time he’d finally managed to zip it up.

Carole was waiting for him outside the changing room. “What took so long?”

“I think they gave me the wrong size. This thing is damn uncomfortable!”

“It looks good on you, though!” She walked around him, admiring the view for a moment. “Come on, stud, let’s go make some sharks jealous!”

They followed the PA to the entrance to the shark tank “You’ll each be feeding a bonnethead shark,” Madison explained. “They are relatively harmless, but there will be safety divers in the tank with you just in case. Once you’ve each fed one of the sharks, one of the divers will hand you a clue.”

Burt nodded, slightly dismayed to see that they had fallen far to the back of the pack, with only a couple of teams behind them.

…

“This wetsuit really isn’t making me feel fabulous,” Mercedes muttered as they made their way to the shark tank. “I feel too exposed, while also feeling like someone has sealed me up in one of those vacuum sealed bags.”

Sam just smiled and took her hand. “You look great. You should be proud of your body, Babe.”

Mercedes smiled and kissed his cheek. “Thanks, Honey.” Sam was one of the most encouraging people she had ever met. He was the first person to make sure you knew to believe in yourself. He was always making everyone see just how special they were.

To be quite honest, the girl wasn’t too interested in swimming with sharks, but at the same time, she realized that this could be a bad sign. The last race, they had gone out on the second leg, and they’d also had to do something that had to do with sea creatures. Or marine life. Or however you wanted to describe it. They’d gone out on fish the last race. Mercedes would be damned if they went out on sharks this race.

“What are we supposed to be feeding them anyway?” she asked, looking to one of the safety divers. The diver showed her a bucket full of small fish. “How are they supposed to get full on those?” she asked.

The diver chuckled. “You feed them more than one of course. They could eat a fair bit. But I promise, we have enough to make sure they’re full.”

Mercedes was still not too sure but she nodded anyway and hesitantly climbed into the tank with Sam. She took a hold of the man’s hand and gave him a look that meant there would be consequences if he let go.

“You’ll be fine sweetheart,” Sam encouraged her. He raised her hand in his. “And I promise I won’t let go of your hand.”

The dark skinned diva let out a shuddering breath. “Okay, I’ll hold the bucket and you feed them,” she told Sam. There was no way she was getting closer than the furthest place necessary.

Sam frowned slightly. “Mercy, we’re supposed to both feed one,” he said. Mercedes groaned.

She was momentarily distracted from her unease by a whooping sound and turned to see both Kurt and Blaine being pulled through the water on shark fins. She had the sense to call out. “Isn’t that a dolphin trick?”

Brittany, who was nearby, looked confused. “They _ are _Dolphins.”

“A fin is a fin, Mercedes!” Blaine yelled as he sped by again, laughing happily. He passed by Santana who patted her girlfriend on the shoulder.

“She meant the animal Brit, not the boyfriends,” the Latina told her gently.

Mercedes couldn’t bear to watch Kurt and Blaine riding the sharks any longer and she turned back to Sam. “Let’s just try and get this over with,” she said uneasily.

…

_ “When I was seven, my cousin and I were on vacation with our families in Florida, and we went to the beach. We were splashing in the waves, not really paying attention, like kids do, you know? And suddenly something bumped into me, knocking me over, and I ended up getting rolled by a wave. When I opened my eyes, trying to find the surface, a shark was right on top of me! I screamed underwater, and almost ended up drowning. _

_ “I’ve had a fear of sharks and water ever since!” _

_ Sam put an arm around her shoulders. “I knew you didn’t like going into the water, but you never told me why. I’m sorry for making you do that, but I’m so proud of you for doing it!” _

_ ... _

Sam still kept a hold of her hand as they moved forward, towards the two sharks that were waiting to be fed. The diver demonstrated how to toss a fish to the sharks and then the blonde man opted to go first, hoping it would calm his girlfriend’s nerves a little bit.

“Nice and easy,” the diver said as Sam tossed the fish. The shark chomped it down in one gulp. “Good job,” the diver said. He nodded his head to Mercedes. “Your turn.”

The girl hesitantly took a fish from the bucket. “I just...toss it?” she said nervously. The diver nodded.

“You don’t even have to get any closer if you don’t want to. Give it a good toss and Rex will catch it.”

For a moment, all the girl’s nerves lifted. “Rex?” she questioned with a raised eyebrow. “You named one man eater after another? Wouldn’t naming a shark after a dinosaur give it a complex?”

The diver just laughed. The moment was enough to give her the courage she needed to do this and she tossed the fish high into the air. The shark, Rex, jumped out of the water and caught it before diving down again. Sam and the diver both applauded her.

They got their next clue, following a few of the other teams back out of the water and opening the envelope. 

“Travel by taxi to Batu Caves and search for your next clue!”

…

Burt glanced around at the location the taxi driver had pulled up to. “Somehow, I don’t think this is the right place!” He showed the driver the clue one more time. “It says Batu Caves. I don’t see any caves around here.”

The younger man studied the clue again, before replying in broken English. “I ask someone.”

He got out of the cab and walked over to a group of men, and conferred for a moment or two, before one of the other men gestured with his arm, giving directions. Their driver nodded and bowed to the man before returning to the taxi. 

“We in Batu Cave Village. Batu Caves five minutes away!”

Burt settled back into his seat with a sigh. That was the thing about The Amazing Race, everything came down to chance. One missed flight, one wrong turn, any little detail gone bad, and you can go from first to worst in a second. Of course they weren’t out of it yet, not until Phil said they were eliminated.

They pulled up to the caves, and Burt spotted the clue box immediately. He was encouraged to see they weren’t dead last. There was at least one team behind them. Adam and Chandler were just pulling up as they opened their clue.

“Roadblock! Who is ready for Wedded Bliss?”

…

_ “In this Roadblock, One team member must gold leaf and decorate a miniature version of the floats used during the procession celebrating Thirukalyanam, the Celestial Wedding of Lord Sundareswarar (Lord Shiva) and Meenakshi (Goddess Parvati). Once their work has been judged worthy, they will receive their next clue.” _

_ … _

“I’ve ever done this before,” Tina said, taking another sheet of gold leaf and carefully applying it to the plaster statue.

“You’re doing a great job,” Kurt said from beside her. “Once you get the hang of it, it’s easy. I’ve done it before, though not on anything this big.”

Tina glanced over to the glasz eyed man’s miniature float. That was something of a misnomer. They really weren’t that small. Each float was about four foot by four foot, and about four feet tall. Kurt was only about halfway finished with the gold leaf part, but his looked much neater than Tina’s did. “How do you get it so perfect? Mine is full of lumps and parts sticking out!”

Kurt shrugged. “It just takes practice. But you can fix yours easy enough. Just dampen the brush and smooth it out.”

Tina watched Kurt for a moment, and then followed his example, grinning as her statue started looking more like the example they had studied.

Tina glanced around at some of the other floats. No one else other than Wes and Jeff were as close to being done as she and Kurt. Becky had somehow managed to get more gold leaf on herself than on her statue, but the tiny blonde dynamo seemed to be having a lot of fun with the task.

Brittany seemed to be dancing to music only she could hear as she worked, which resulted in her statue having random patches of gold leaf here and there.

Deciding to focus on her own work, Tina quickly finished the gold leafing, and moved on to adding the flowers, seeds, and silks that adorned the float, and finished faster than she expected, receiving the clue.

…

Santana was not a patient person, and it was killing her to just stand here and watch Brittany work. She loved the girl, there was no doubt about that. That was the only reason she wasn’t growling in frustration right now.

“Brit, sweetie,” she said as gently as she could. “You’re doing a great job, but we really need to hurry and finish. This is a race, after all!”

Brittany looked over at her partner for a moment and back at her statue. It was still covered in patches and she frowned slightly. “But San, what’s a festival without music and dancing?” she asked, throwing her arms out and the dampness of the brush she was holding spattered, flicking specks onto Becky, who was next to her, by accident.

“Watch it Tweedle Dumb!” Becky called out as she flinched from Brittany’s spatter. Santana was ready to snap at Becky for the comment, but the feisty small blonde rounded on her before she had the chance. “Tell your girlfriend to stop making a mess, Sandbags!” she shouted.

The other blonde stood still for a moment, surprised by the outburst and gawking at Becky, who she had thought she could be friends with. It was enough to still Brittany’s progress for a moment, and she looked at the other girl. “Sunshine and unicorns,” she said gently, dipping her brush to dampen it again and going back to her statue, no longer dancing.

Becky rolled her eyes and moved to put more gold leaf on her statue. She was still covered in more of it than the statue. Sue had given her instructions to ignore the haters. So she was.

Santana was furious that Becky had upset sweet Brittany to the point where she seemed to have lost the spirit, like the time Brittany had told her she’d been pushed to stop believing in Santa Claus. However, it seemed to have a positive effect on their progress so the Latina let it go as Brittany finished decorating the float and the two of them got their clue seconds before Sue and Becky.

“Travel on foot to the Pit Stop, the Statue of Hanuman.”

…

_ “In the Hindu faith, Hanuman is the God of Celibacy and Strength. This statue is the Pit Stop for this leg of the race. The last team to check in here, may be eliminated!” _

_ … _

Phil smiled at the young woman standing beside him at the mat. It was almost impossible not to smile at the small woman. Sunshine Corazon was as bright and bubbly as her name, and had impressed the host with her intelligence and talent. So far, this season’s greeters were a vast improvement on the previous season.

Marley gave him the signal that the first team was about to arrive, and he looked up, wondering who it would be. He smiled when he saw the newlyweds racing towards him.

Sunshine smiled and waved at them as they arrived. “Welcome to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia! What an adorable couple you are!”

Tina blushed, and Mike put an arm around her waist. “Thank you! I love your sari!”

“Tina and Mike, you are team number one!”

“Yes! I can’t believe we actually won a leg!” Tina said, hugging her husband.

Phil laughed, and his smile grew brighter. “As the winners of this leg, you have won a Kenyan Safari for two, and you will each receive a Canon EOS Rebel T7 Digital SLR Camera with EF-S 18-55mm IS, Canon EF 75-300mm Lens and 500mm preset Lens with T-Mount Adapter and 22 piece professional bundle, that you can enjoy after the race!”

“That’s amazing! Thank you, Phil!” Mike said.

“How has this race been compared to last time?”

Tina laughed. “Last time, we didn’t know any of these people, but they quickly became friends, even though we were competing against them. This time, we all started out already knowing each other, and while we’re all still competing, we’re having a lot more fun. Yeah, it would be great to win the million dollars, but to be surrounded by our friends is worth more than anything money can buy.”

“Well, congratulations, and good luck with the rest of the race!”

Phil was still smiling as the next two teams raced into view. It was a foot race between Kurt and Blaine and Nick and Jeff. The latter just barely edged out the former, and all four men were laughing, which was infectious. Phil sensed a much lighter atmosphere this season, and he loved it.

“Nick and Jeff, you are team number two!”

“Kurt and Blaine, you are team number three!”

“Wes and David, you are team number four!”

…

“Great job, Honey!” Emma said, giving Will a quick peck on the lips as he received their clue. Though neither of them ever talked about Will’s crazy ex wife, Emma knew the woman had been a crafter, and that Will had worked on a few projects with her, so the redhead wasn’t surprised that her fiance had done well at this particular challenge.

Emma probably could have done it, but her OCD would have had her working at a much slower pace as she tried to be methodical. Even a very tiny flaw would have had her in fits. She was doing much better with her germaphobia, and her anxiety disorder, but the OCD was still one thing she struggled with.

…

_ “The medication helps a lot, along with the self hypnosis and other techniques I’ve learned to cope with stress and anxiety, but the OCD has been part of me for so long, I don’t know if I will ever manage to control it. The best I can hope for is to learn not to let it control me.” _

_ … _

“Will and Emma, you are team number five!”

“Really?” Emma exclaimed. “It’s almost impossible to believe how well we are doing this time!”

“I believe it,” Will said, hugging her. “I told you you could do anything if you believed in yourself!”

Phil smiled at the couple. “You’ve been such an inspiration to so many people, Emma. Did you know we had more people write in saying how you gave them the courage to try something new than any of the other teams last season? Just imagine what they are going to be saying about you this season. You are an amazing woman.”

“You’re going to make me cry, Phil! Will said it best last time. Being brave isn’t about not being afraid. It’s being afraid and still taking the chance.”

…

Burt swore under his breath as he ripped another sheet of gold leaf. His big hands weren’t accustomed to such delicate work. Why couldn’t the task involve assembling a car engine?

He was very aware of the other racers as one buy one they each completed the task and received their clue. Soon it was down to him, Rachel, and Adam. He finally finished just as Rachel received her clue, and was relieved when the judge announced his work was acceptable, even as Adam finished his work as well.

He knew he couldn’t outrun the other two teams, and had accepted that they would more than likely come in last, and he was okay with that. Winning the race wasn’t part of the plan. He had only hoped he and Carole could stay in a little longer, to keep an eye on Kurt and his boyfriend.

As it became apparent to Finn that Burt was struggling with the Roadblock, Finn had whispered to him that he’d make sure the pale man was okay, that they wouldn’t let Adam and Chandler cause any problems. Burt had thanked his stepson, thankful that there would be someone to watch over Kurt that he could trust. He trusted almost everyone else in the race to have Kurt and Blaine’s back, and that settled his mind even more.

…

“Sam and Mercedes, you are team number six!”

“Santana and Brittany, you are team number seven!

“Sue and Becky, you are team number eight!”

“Finn and Rachel, you are team number nine!”

“Adam and Chandler, you are team number ten!”

Phil smiled sadly as the final team came into view. “Burt and Carole, you are the last team to arrive. I’m so sorry to tell you, you have both been eliminated from the race.”

“We figured,” Burt said, smiling at the host.

“You two were in the top five fan favorite racers last season. I’m sure they will be sad to see you go so soon this season.”

Carole smiled. “I hope they’ll see that even though we didn’t go as far this season as we would have liked, that we enjoyed every second of it, and that we have no regrets whatsoever.”

“Your sons are both still in it. Do you have any advice for them?”

Burt smiled. “Trust each other, and remember to communicate.”

“Don’t give up,” Carole added. “And don’t forget to have fun!”

Phil smiled, shaking Burt’s hand, and receiving a hug from Carole as the two walked off the mat. They would definitely be missed.


End file.
